Wednesday, February 15, 2012

My life ... in so many words

In case you missed these irreverent, irrelevant, inappropriate and otherwise useless Facebook posts in the past couple of months (most recent first) ...

Oh no! There's a new reality show called "Worst Cooks in America." Maggie Paulson will probably nominate me for that, too, after "What not to Wear"

Any minute I just know the roses and chocolates and pretty shoes will arrive from Duane Paulson.

Most hilarious letter to the editor we've ever received. If you're a geek ... enjoy! A Turntable for Lefties?

If you propose to your lady at a sporting event and it's captured on the Jumbotron and she says no or hesitates ... is it over or do you buy her a hot dog and try again later? 6 Epic Jumbotron Marriage Proposal Failures

Message from Duane Paulson at 12:04 am: Happy Valentines Day. I win! I wished it first. Woot. [yes, dear, it's a contest]

J Lo has a big butt and she wears it well. I have a big butt and it just looks like ... a big butt.

Is it rude to ask guests to bring furniture to a house warming?

I love it when Donald J. Boudreaux bashes Krugman: "First, you ignore important questions regarding the weight that INCOME inequality should have relative to other forms of inequality – such as inequality of treatment before the law, inequality of consumption opportunities, inequality of leisure time, inequality of risk-taking, and inequality of work-effort. And you take for granted that income inequality is indeed not only unambiguously a problem, but a problem whose correction unambiguously justifies granting more power to the state."

There is, perhaps, no greater feeling in the world than to cancel Cable TV service.

Well, we were going to stay in Minnesota once our neighbor Michele Bachmann dropped out of the race. But with ultra-conservative Santorum's landslide victory this week, we're fed up. Moving to California.

And, it's official. We're moving to Carlsbad.

To ponder: If you drink milk straight from the container and your mother isn't around to see it ... is it still naughty?

My hair is starting to grow back. I will now be accepting dinner invitations.

Memo from Amsterdam: I miss Minnesota weather.

Pretty sure this is my shortest haircut ever. I said Ellen Degeneress. He gave me Sinead. Oh well, what do you expect for $12.99?

My mother has a pencil sharpener on her desk. I give her this: It's electric.

In a press release I just received titled, "Most Americans Are Clueless About What To Do With The Ashes Of Loved Ones," one of the priceless lines (among many) is: "The simple fact is that many people have great plans but they are rarely executed.” (Indeed, most die of natural causes)

Oh, Mark. The 9/11 flight "wouldn't have went down like it did"??? Skip your karate classes and go straight to grammar school.

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